3. Change Your Environment to Set Yourself Up for Success
Don’t count on motivation and willpower alone to accomplish your goals. Set yourself up for success by changing your surroundings to encourage healthy behavior, Dr. Gillihan says.
That might mean buying more fruits and vegetables at the grocery store or charging your phone out of reach at night so you aren’t tempted to pick up the device while you’re trying to sleep. Whatever the goal may be, make sure your environment makes it as easy as possible to reach it, Gillihan explains. “You have to change the system.”
4. Surround Yourself With Supporters
Round up your personal cheerleading squad and keep them at the ready, says Camilla Nonterah, PhD, an associate professor of psychology at the University of Richmond in Virginia who researches mental health in underserved groups and minority populations.
If your goal is to eat healthier, for example, invite a friend over to cook a healthy meal with you.
Other members of your support team could include your doctor, a therapist, a personal trainer, an exercise buddy, or a peer support group (virtual or in-person).
5. Spot the Saboteurs
Likewise, if certain people feel uncomfortable with your goals or with the behavior changes you want to make — especially if it’s an old habit they still enjoy — recognize that and be prepared to stick with your goals, even if they try to persuade you to do otherwise.
Remember that you don’t need to defend or even explain your personal choices, Gillihan says. Instead, be firm with them about your decisions at the outset. He suggests letting people know what they need to in the simplest way possible. If, for example, you’re trying to drink less, you can just say: “No thanks, I’m not drinking tonight.” You don’t need to provide more details, Gillihan adds. “You’re not responsible for removing other people’s discomfort.”
6. Experiment
Specificity can help you clearly understand what your goals are and identify steps you might need to take to get there. But a less-rigid approach at other times can be strategic, too, says Gillihan. To spend less time on his phone, Gillihan says he experimented with removing certain apps for a short period of time.
When you treat your goal as an experiment, you can learn as you go, he says. Try committing to a new behavior for a month rather than for the rest of all time, he suggests. That way there’s an opportunity to shift the goal depending on what is and is not working.
7. Automate Cues to Keep Yourself on Track
Again, don’t rely on motivation and willpower alone. Try automating some reminders, like phone alerts or alarms to cue yourself to drink more water or take a break from sitting.
Visual cues — sticky notes on your mirror, for example, to remind you not to skip the gym — make it easier to maintain a change in routine, Dr. Nonterah says. Tracking progress via an app or with a pen and paper can also keep you on pace.
8. Accept Barriers That Are Out of Your Control
Worrying about what you can’t change usually just increases your anxiety and discourages you, Nonterah says. If you can’t afford to hire a personal trainer, for example, there’s nothing you can do about that. Instead, she says, focus on: “What can I do with what I have?” Be realistic about what you can achieve.
9. Keep Trying
Behavior change is hard, Nonterah says. So don’t be discouraged if you don’t reach 100 percent of your goal the first few times. Just keep trying with the strategies outlined above.
“If you do something 80 percent of the time, that’s a lot better than not doing it at all,” Gillihan adds.
The Takeaway
- New Year’s resolutions may be well-intentioned, but sometimes unrealistic goals can get in the way of personal success.
- It may be more helpful to look at smaller, longer-term changes that add up than one large goal.
- In addition to surrounding yourself with positive influences and setting yourself up for success, try to accept that certain things are out of your control. Do the best with what you have.
- All in all, the important thing is to keep trying. Don’t be deterred by momentary setbacks on the path toward your goal.
