The Crucial Importance of Self-Care When You’re a Caregiver

For caregivers, practicing self-care is vital for protecting your health. But supporting your loved one can take a significant amount of time and energy, hindering your ability to take care of your own health and well-being. Nonetheless, it’s crucial to prioritize self-care, even though finding the time can feel impossible.

Here’s everything you need to know about the unique challenges of caregiving and how to cope with and recover from caregiver burnout.

The Caregiver’s Mental Load

Caregiving brings a variety of challenges that are unique to each person. One of the most common and significant challenges is the tax on your time and ability to manage stress. Juggling your care recipient’s everyday needs, medical care, financial and legal considerations, and more may affect your ability to think clearly and sustain your own energy level. As your loved one’s needs grow, managing the emotional burden and finding time for self-care can become more difficult.

Sometimes caregivers may be aware that self-care is important, yet they aren’t able to find the time or space to prioritize it. In this case, the caregiver may feel guilt around their perceived failure to practice self-care, says Simran Malhotra, MD, a triple board-certified physician in palliative care, hospice, and internal medicine and medical reviewer for Everyday Health. “Struggling to prioritize self-care is often a reflection of caregiving intensity and not personal failure,” she says.

The Challenges of Family Caregiving

While every situation is different, research finds many family caregivers face similar struggles. Among others, such factors include the following, according to the AARP-NAC report:

• Lack of Time for Self-Care On average, caregivers provide care for 27 hours a week. But nearly 1 in 4 put in 41 or more hours per week — the equivalent of a full-time job. This time is often spent supporting activities of daily living like getting in and out of bed, getting dressed, going to and from the toilet, showering, feeding, and dealing with incontinence. There’s also the need to communicate with healthcare professionals, advocate for your loved one, and manage medical, nursing, financial, and legal tasks. All of this work takes away time to care for yourself.
• Complex Medical Needs Many caregivers take on significant medical and nursing tasks, such as injections, tube feedings, and catheter and colostomy care. Most say they have no choice but to do it, despite having` little to no training.
• Inadequate Support The AARP-NAC report found that about 7 in 10 caregivers have no paid help, and many struggle to find affordable services. Navigating a fragmented and confusing healthcare system — often without acknowledgment of your role — can be frustrating and expensive.
• Employment Issues Most working caregivers say they have to take time off from their jobs to meet their loved one’s needs, sometimes resulting in a loss of benefits, depletion of savings, and need to delay retirement.
• Financial and Economic Strain About 3 in 10 caregivers have stopped saving, and nearly 1 in 4 have taken on more debt — effects that could have even more significant repercussions over years of providing care. Most say an income tax credit or program to pay caregivers would help.
• Loneliness Caregiving can be isolating, especially if you are living with your care recipient, they have high needs, or you’re in a rural area. Many people say caregiving can be a rewarding and meaningful experience, but 1 in 4 family caregivers also say they feel alone.
• Loss of Identity Caregiving can also eat up time and mental space once devoted to your own needs, interests, and social life. Research suggests that a result of caregiving for some is the loss of sense of self beyond the identity as a caregiver.

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• Heavy Emotions Caregivers may experience complicated feelings about their relationship with their care recipient, such as resentment over the burden of caregiving, guilt over feeling that way toward a loved one, and worry and grief over their worsening health status. On top of this, they also have to help their care recipient manage their emotions and extend grace when anger and conflict arise.

How Caregiving Can Lead to Burnout

Caregiver burnout can hurt your ability to care for yourself and your loved one. Many caregivers neglect their health while caring for someone else. When health problems are left untreated, you and your care recipient can experience a dip in your quality of life. In rare cases, caregivers could even face their own health crises due to the stress of caregiving.

Signs of Caregiver Burnout

• Feeling overwhelmed
• Feeling alone or left behind by others
• Frequently feeling tired, worried, or sad
• Sleeping too much or too little
• Gaining or losing a lot of weight
• No longer being interested in activities you used to enjoy
• Easily getting irritated or angry
• Frequent headaches or body aches
• Coping with unhealthy behaviors like smoking or drinking too much alcohol

It’s important to remember that you deserve to be taken care of just as much as your care recipient does.

Self-Care for Caregivers

Getting the support you need and practicing self-care can help you recover from burnout, boost your well-being, and become a better caregiver. The Supportive Care in Cancer article from July 2021 emphasizes the importance of addressing the imbalance between how much you are giving and how much you are receiving. That means opening yourself up to outside support and resources, including the following strategies.

Strengthen Your Personal Network

While a helpful and important strategy to implement, self-care alone won’t solve the issues of stress and burnout for caregivers. Letting your personal support system and community take care of you is essential.

Here’s how to build a stronger support system:

• Find a caregiver advocate. Use the Eldercare Locator search tool or call 800-677-1116 to connect with an advocate at your closest Area Agency on Aging.

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  With their help you can learn about support groups, adult day care centers, transportation services, and referrals for financial and legal support to lighten your load.
• Offload some of the work. The belief that you can do everything by yourself is a risk factor for caregiver burnout. If you could use more support from other family members, use this guide from the National Institute on Aging to consider your strengths and limits and learn how to pass on responsibilities to others.

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  The Family Caregiver Alliance (FCA) also has helpful tips for how to hold a family meeting to discuss common issues like feeling overwhelmed or managing finances.

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• Join a support group. Find people who understand what you’re going through to exchange personalized advice. A caregiver advocate, healthcare provider, or nonprofit organization could help refer you to a group.
• Get workplace support. Contact HR to learn about what support your employer can offer. According to the FCA, some companies have employee assistance programs for counseling, could help you find eldercare or childcare, or offer paid or unpaid time off.

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Practice Healthy Coping Skills

Beyond building a stronger support system, improving your approach to self-care can also help foster resilience. The following coping tips may help keep burnout at bay:

• Eat plenty of healthy meals and snacks. Stock up on fruits and vegetables, whole grains, lean protein, and healthy fats. To save time, opt for precut or frozen fruits and veggies.
• Prioritize sleep. If caring for your loved one means disrupted sleep, avoid using caffeinated beverages to stay awake. Instead, take naps when you can.
• Weave in movement. In addition to supporting your overall health, exercise can help to boost your mood and energy levels. The physical activity guidelines from the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services recommends moderate-intensity exercise for 150 minutes per week or vigorous-intensity exercise for 75 minutes a week, in addition to strength training twice per week. If that amount of movement isn’t feasible for you right now, start smaller. Research supports that walking 7,000 steps per day can reduce the risk of heart disease and all-cause mortality. Even better, those benefits begin at 4,000 steps.

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• Schedule checkups. Don’t neglect preventative care appointments. Your health and well-being matter, too.
• Practice asking for help. It can be difficult to ask for help when you play the role of helper so frequently. Reflect on your needs at least once a week and find ways to ask for support.
• Make respite a habit. Look at your calendar and mark down times to take a regular break every week, month, and year. Regular breaks can lower stress and boost positive experiences, protecting against chronic stress. Respite could involve recruiting a driver to help transport your loved one to appointments a few days a week, using adult daycare once a week, swapping duties with another family member, or scheduling a vacation. Use the ARCH National Respite Locator Service to find local services.

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As a caregiver, you have the right to take care of yourself, ask for help, know your limits, and express difficult emotions. “The goal of self-care during caregiving is to maintain strength, emotional well-being, and the capacity to continue caring for your loved one — not necessarily achieving optimal peak health for yourself,” says Dr. Malhotra. “So even a little bit goes a long way.”

Schedule Mental Health Care

Sometimes you need support to cope with the toll of caregiving. If you’re feeling anxious, depressed, or burned out, schedule a mental health appointment for yourself just as you would for your loved one. You can contact a primary care physician or mental health care professional for support.

If caregiving responsibilities make it difficult to carve out time, online therapy may present a more convenient and accessible option. Use our guide to find the best online therapy provider for you.

Resources for Caregivers

• AARP Caregiving Forum Chat with fellow caregivers for older adults.

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• Alzheimer’s Association Join a support group and get advice on caring for a loved one with Alzheimer’s disease on community message boards.

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• Family Caregiver Alliance Support Groups Join online support groups for caregivers, young adult caregivers, or caregivers in the LGBTQ+ community.

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• Caregiver Action Network Community Ask about how to deal with medical professionals and care for loved ones with mental health issues, Alzheimer’s disease, Huntington’s disease, Parkinson’s disease, or COPD.

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• Veterans Affairs Caregiver Support Program Learn how to support veterans and their loved ones, or call its Caregiver Support Line at 855-260-3274.

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• FCA Family Care Navigator Find caregiving support services in your state, such as government health and disability programs and disease-specific organizations.

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• Medicare.gov Access resources for caregivers who are supporting someone on Medicare.

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• Well Spouse Association Join a support group and get resources for caregivers caring for chronically ill or disabled partners.

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The Takeaway

• Nearly 1 in 4 Americans are caregivers, and of them, a quarter indicate caregiving has compromised their ability to care for themselves.
• Caregiving can be a meaningful and challenging experience. Because taking care of someone else can take up so much time and energy, it’s common for caregivers to experience chronic stress and burnout.
• With rest, support, and self-care, you can recover from burnout and build resilience to protect your health for the long haul.