How Self-Care Can Help You Live More Fully With Fibromyalgia

To treat fibromyalgia, you need the right doctor, medication, and complementary therapies. An equally important piece in the fibromyalgia treatment toolbox: self-care. Self-care can mean different things to different people, but ultimately, it’s a way to take back control, manage symptoms, and cope with the unpredictability of the condition.

For Naomi Davis (they/them), improv is a major form of self-care that helps them feel better as they navigate their life with fibromyalgia. They were diagnosed in 2023. “I’m still able to perform and connect and play, but in a way where I’m in control,” they say. “It’s given me more empowered feelings.”

Sometimes I appear to be really active and seemingly really okay, and then I have other days where I quite literally can’t do anything without full help and support.

— Naomi Davis, diagnosed with fibromyalgia in 2023

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Care for their mental health, a crucial part of self-care, has helped Davis cope with the unpredictability of fibromyalgia. Therapy, mindfulness, and visualization techniques have helped lessen anxiety and improve their quality of life.

For Lynne Matallana (she/her), who was diagnosed with fibromyalgia in 1995, acupuncture and massage have been particularly helpful.

There’s two parts of our health: There’s the step of seeing a doctor, and then there’s the other step of doing integrative things.

— Lynne Matallana, diagnosed with fibromyalgia in 1995

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Davis has found comfort in taking independent steps to improve their well-being. “I’m listening to myself, and [even though] I’m still looking for providers who feel affirming and good, at the end of the day, the specific diagnosis isn’t as healing for me as connecting and using the tools that I’ve been learning from the fibromyalgia community.”

Here’s what has worked for Matallana and Davis:

• Find ways to unwind. For Davis, that means using a neck warmer or soaking in a hot tub to relieve tension. “Even if they’re not curing me, they are helping me get to a calmer, more relaxed state,” they say.
• Take a deep breath … and then another. “Everybody has to first learn how to breathe,” says Matallana. “I laugh, because I’d go into a room of people with fibromyalgia and their shoulders were up by their ears because they were so tense. We don’t breathe. We forget. We’re holding everything in, so our pain won’t get us. When you’re not breathing … it’s not calming.”
• Practice visualization. When Davis is in pain, they imagine they’re a scuba diver observing all the different fish — their colors, their swimming —  and “I feel the pain literally leave my body.”
• Walk around. You don’t have to go for a five-mile hike, but “you need to be active,” says Matallana. “It seems counterintuitive [to walk if you’re in pain], but those are the things that actually end up helping us.” Research shows that low-intensity physical activity, like aerobic exercise and stretching, helps people with fibromyalgia feel better, possibly by relaxing the muscular and nervous system and reducing stress.

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• Try cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT). For Davis, CBT has helped enormously with feeling understood and managing their pain. According to research, CBT can help improve people’s perceptions of fibromyalgia-related pain and boost their self-confidence. CBT specifically for chronic pain (CBT-CP) can also be helpful.

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Ultimately, the best way to manage fibromyalgia is through a combination of self-care strategies alongside treatment from a doctor — especially because fibromyalgia is known to overlap with other health conditions such as sleep disorders, says Ryan Anderson, MD, PhD, a rheumatologist at Duke Health in Durham, North Carolina.

Self-care measures like getting enough exercise and quality sleep “are important for all of us, but they’re even more important for people with fibromyalgia,” Dr. Anderson explains. The key, though, is to find a doctor who listens to you and wants to help you find a winning combo of self-care and medical intervention that’s right for your symptoms.